Sandbag

In my adventures, one thing I do dislike coming across is the cockblocking friend.  It’s something that’s ALWAYS discouraging, no matter how subtle or blatant.  I can deal with cockblocking though, since it’s something that you have to chalk up to the Game and move on.

While cockblocking is bad, there’s something that I absolutely HATE:

Getting sandbagged (Definition Here)

Now, when I refer to “being sandbagged” I specifically mean that your girl’s friends (both female AND male) are trying to undermine your relationship with the girl via snide remarks or not-subtle “hints” about your supposedly shitty character when you’re not around.

Why would they sandbag?  I don’t know exactly, but my experience with this has me drawing the following conclusions:

Female Friend

Either one of two scenarios:

(1) She hates your guts for some reason, is miserable and doesn’t want her friend to be happy either (similar to cockblocking mentality).

(2) She wants you, so she sabotages the relationship so you’ll get together with her instead (rare, in my experience).

Male Friend

Only scenario (non-homos only, homos fall into Female Friend category):

Guy has been LBJF’ed by your girl (and “accepts” it outwardly), is still in love with her (but won’t admit it), and white-knights hard for her (since you’re a shitty guy and if only she’d see that he’s so great!!! blah blah blah)

Personally, I was sandbagged in my relationship with FirstGF by one of my close friends (and one of her girlfriends who was fat and busted, if you’re wondering but that’s not important).

So, I’ve known this guy since kindergarten and we’ve been hanging out for a couple of years prior to me dating FirstGF.  However, since she was in the social circle long before I was, “bros before hoes” didn’t apply for me and coupled to his pedestalization of her, didn’t bode well for the fledgling relationship.

He sandbagged me more and more over time, and so FirstGF and I later broke up as a result.

I can’t come up with a counter to the sandbag, since you’ll never be around when it happens.  However, I do believe that having tight Game, where the girl is very into you, will have way of lessening the effect of this if it occurs.

The moral of the story?  Game is important.  Learn it.  Practice it.  Live it.

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4 thoughts on “Sandbag

  1. I used to have this issue in a certain large social circle I was in.

    Admittedly, I was somewhat of a kissing whore. But, I was still a complete beta. And I had tons of guys (and some girls) in that group telling the ladies of the group to stay away from me because I’m a player.

    Now, it is easy to dismiss it as a strictly a situation of the guys wanted me out of the competition (which honestly, they were welcome to most of the girls in that group) or that the girls just didn’t want the other girls to be happy. I dunno.

    But, as I faded out of that social circle when I was married (only keeping in touch with a handful of people rarely) many got married (sometimes to each other). Some might think that would prevent them from continuing to do it.

    Not so.

    When my ex-wife and I split up, I went to a halloween party with some people from that social circle. All of the ones I knew were in relationships. I met one of their friends up there (dressed as a Naughty Nurse). We were hitting it off and at one point I left to get a drink and came back and she was cold and ignored me. She had been warned off me by one of the girls (who was in a relationship!)

    Now, I don’t know which one it was, and I only know that they did this because a few months after the halloween party, she contacted me through FB and told me but decided that she would talk to me anyway.

    I could do nothing but laugh.

    That shit never goes away.

  2. I expect it now. My “friends” are real friends that would stick up for me when I’m not around. I just dont associate with people that have or would sandbag me.
    At least you know you’re on the right track though, people wouldn’t care what you do if they didn’t view you as some sort of threat.

  3. Only one thing to do if you can find the perp, go on the offense and treat them as the enemy. Let the others in your social circle choose sides.

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